Friday, November 6, 2009
News from the future... or Planet Stupid
The way things are heading, Mary Jane--the evil weed, will be decriminalized in our lifetime. Well, your lifetime. With my luck, the law will go into effect the day after I step on the rainbow. So, it's not inconceivable for a hapless soul--named, say, Calvin Hoover, to call the cops to report his stash had been stolen. But neither Calvin nor we are in the future. We are in the here and now, and calling the Marion County Sheriff's Department from outside the Freeloader Tavern to report--between bouts of projectile vomiting--that someone broke into your truck and stole 400 bucks, your favorite (read: only) jacket and 3/4 oz of pot qualifies you as being a resident of Planet Stupid.
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4 comments:
Mmm...note to self: must go to the Freeloader Tavern...
++++
It's amazing how a few words can be so confusing. You are referring to Mr. Hoover, I take it, as the one "drinking and talking to a bunch of retards"-- the other patrons in the Freeloader Tavern. Again, Mr. Hoover is the dumbass? Ah, but his ID says he is a resident of Planet Stupid. What do you expect?
As for frequenting the aforementioned Freeloader Tavern--since Lancaster Drive is the embodiment of the very worst America has to offer-- from chain restaurants, tire stores and "exotic" lounges-- I'd tend to stay away from the Tavern, or any other bucket of blood on that road.
Duh, of course Hoover, who else? Of course Planet Stupid...run by Barney Frank.
You just had to go there, didn't you.
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