Twistin' by the Pool

(White House Press Secretary Dana Perino at the Monarch Beach Resort in Dana Point with AIG executives)

McClatchy Newspapers reported today that, "in an unusual 6 a.m. announcement, the Trasury Department said it would use the $700 billion rescue plan that was passed October 3--originally designed to purchase troubled mortgage assets--to purchase with taxpayers' money. some $40 billion in senior preferred stock from AIG." The article goes on to say that "taxpayers are now on the hook for $150 billion at AIG, not the original $85 billion."

"During Monday's White House briefing, spokeswoman Dana Perino said the decision was made for the good of the global financial system."

This announcement of added aid to the "ailing" insurance company comes just days after their "asset management meeting" at a resort in Arizona (for over $300,000). They were planning on hosting Terry Bradshaw for a motivational appearance. His usual fee is $40,000. He was not booked, but not necessarily in a show of belt tightening. One bill that leaked out was for about $400. for drinks and h'ors d'oeuvres at the local McCormick & Schmick's.

Readers will recall that after the inital bailout of AIG last month, their executives went on a "retreat" to the Monarch Beach Resort in Dana Point, in Orange County, California, where they spent over $442,000. Still unconfirmed is Dana Perino's presence at the resort, twisting by the pool...


Mmm, youre gonna look so cute
Sunglasses and bathing suites
Be the baby of my dreams
Like the ladies in the magazine
Yeah, were gonna be so neat
Dance to the eurobeat
Yeah, were gonna be so cool
Twisting by the pool

Im a twisting fool
Just twisting, yeah twisting
Twisting by the pool

Apologies to Mark Knopfler for co-opting the above lyrics.


A 6 a.m. announcement??? I should be quoting REM's "The End of the World."

I read the news today...

oh, boy.



Jim Reutenberg of the New York Times reported today that "just a few weeks ago, at the height of the campaign, Representative Michelle Bachmann of Minnesota told Chris Matthews of MSNBC that, when it came to Barack Obama, "I'm very concerned that he may have anti-American views.'"

But there she was on Thursday, after narrowly escaping defeat because of those comments, saying she was 'extremely grateful that we have an African-American who has won this year.' Ms. Bachmann, a republican, called Mr. Obama's victory, which included her state, "a tremendous signal we sent."




A few days ago, President Bush assembled his staff on the White House lawn and, holding back the tears, thanked them for their service. He also emphasized his earnest desire to make the transition for President-Elect Obama as smooth as possible, for the good of the country and so on. Today, Associated Press reported that President Bush is hard at work rolling back environmental rules for things like mining in the Grand Canyon, and dumping earth during mining into nearby streams (that was enacted by the Reagan administration). He is also working to allow higher levels of emissions from electric plants, as well as automobile emissions. The thinking behind this rush is that there is a 60 day delay before the new regulations take effect and once they are, undoing them will be "a more itme consuming job for the next congress and administration." There is a place in hell waiting for George W. Bush and perhaps his Presidential Library. And, no, you will not be able to use your AAA membership to get a discount

Truth is Stranger than Fiction, cont.

LEFT: Stu Rasmussen, Mayor of Silverton, Oregon 1988
RIGHT: Stu Rasmussen, Mayor of Silverton 2008


Our sleepy little town is on the map. Our mayor-elect has made "stupid celebrities dot com." Really. Today, people from Portland won't ask where Silverton is. Instead, they'll roll their eyes. Portland, for chrissake. The place that boasts bumper stickers that read KEEP PORTLAND WEIRD.

Carl Hiaasen, Ed Wood or David Kelly--combined--could never come up with the plot line for this one. Of I wrote it, literary agents and publishing house editors would reject me and the manuscript summarily. I couldn't make this stuff up. Our realtor told us that Silverton was diverse before we moved here, but this is ridiculous. I am not being critical nor judgmental. Like the ump, I'm merely calling it the way I've seen it. Look it up. Google Stu. Or, maybe not. That sounds weird, too.

Lou Reed runs through my mind for the soundtrack. Or Paul Simon...

I know what I know,
I'll sing what I said,
We come and we go,
That's a thing that I keep
In the back of my head
I know what i know,
I'll sing what I said,
We come and we go,
That's a thing that I keep
In the back of my head,

You Might be a Redneck...

Let me tell you a little story
About a man named Todd
Who has the balls of an elephant
And the arrogance of a God
Who used his wife's office to intimidate a trooper
And followed her around with a pooper scooper

Circus elephants... domestic terrorists

Now his wife's name's Sarah
And she's a real hockey mom
Who was asked to join the ticket
to be the maverick sex bomb
The party wanted to dress her
For about twenty thou
But that wasn't enough for
This Uppity White Trash sow

Saks and Neimans, you betcha

To Needless Mark-Up she did enter
Buying outfits and suits
Like the last big spender
Her poor little daughter
Looked like a trailer park mess
So for her, nothing less
Than a Luis Vuitton dress

Labels on bags, dresses and clutches

Poor Todd stood in the shadows
and began to pout
His old clothes made him really stand out
A new suit or two he really did need
So they buried the bills and hoped
The party wouldn't see

Big spenders, those Palins
Suits and boots
Brooches and jewels
A kiddie Vuitton bag
And that's not all...

Well, the Presidential election
It came and went
Her running mate and she lost
But the money was spent
The clothes she says
Will be put on sale
And poor old Todd
Off to the county...

Jail, that is
Graybar hotel
Scapegoat slammer

Now it's time for us to say goodbye
To Sarah and Todd and her brood of five
Or six or seven or maybe eight
While they head back north
And ponder their fate

Don't count her out
Not by a long shot
There are a lot of people
who still think she's hot
She's a mavericky woman who knows how to kill
And shops til she drops and racks up those bills

In Manhattan, gosh darn it
Department stores, boutiques
Fancy Restaurants and daylight in winter

Bye now
Y'all come back, hear?
Say, in about four years



Apologies to the Mortal Jivester

Not so fast...

Hold on a second, there Missy--

There are a few things we need to clear up before you get on that Straight Talk Express Jumbo Jet and head back up to the land of then midnight sun, or what ever you want to call that frozen wasteland that is just hospitable to reelect a convicted felon to the senate. There is a financial matter we need to clear up.

This thing about how much money you spent on clothing for you, your "first dude" husband and your oversized brood of kids, Bristol, Piper, Trig, Ski-Rack, Snowmobile and the developmentally challenged Zamboni.

According to a report in Newsweek, senior McCain adviser Nicolle Wallace had told Mrs Palin to buy three suits for the party's convention and hire a stylist. Instead, Mrs Palin was said to have gone out and bought clothes for herself and her family at high-end designer stores Saks Fifth Avenue and Neiman Marcus.

One aide estimated Mrs Palin, the former Mayor of Wasilla, had spent "tens of thousands" more than the reported $US150,000 and that $US20,000 to $US40,000 was spent buying clothes for her husband, snowmobile racer Todd Palin.

Newsweek said Mrs Palin also used low-level staffers to buy some of the clothes on their credit cards and the McCain campaign found out last week when the aides sought reimbursement. Some of the clothes have been lost.

This is the same Sarah Palin who defended herself by saying that "the clothes were bought for her" and she was frugal. She also said she was going back to wearing her own bargain clothes.

The Newsweek report also says Republican nominee John McCain rarely spoke to Mrs Palin during the campaign and his advisers deliberately kept him in the dark about the Alaskan Governor's shopping sprees because they thought he would be offended.

I'm wondering if the Alaskan senate will now take up the per diem scandal, of her charging the state for the nights she was at home as well as them footing the bill for her taking her daughters to New York with her on "state" business.

I hate to think this is a partisan issue, but does hubris run through the GOP like oil through the pipeline?

Just wondering.

Well, that was interesting...

Is it me, or did that seem a bit anti-climactic? Kind of like watching Dick (and Ryan [gag me]) counting down to midnight in New York with the Waterford ball when you're on the west coast and it's closing in on 9:00.

I agree with the pundits, that the impact of this election won't be felt for days and blah blah blah. Personally, I would like to call for a blogatorium. I will give it a day's rest if the rest of the blogosphere does. Sarah bashing has become instantly declassé and Mac is back (home) with Cindy. Let's all take Wednesday off. Save up your Monday morning quarterbacking until Thursday.

Me? I guess I'll change the strings on my Bigsby equipped Supro...

The Devil's Tailpiece or Paul Bigsby and his damned invention should be relegated to obsolescence.

So I took my Eastwood/Supro Coronado DeLuxe off the wall and decided to plug 'er in. It must have been time, because the high e string broke. It's not like I just got the guitar, but I have to admit I have never changed the strings on it. It features a Bigsby tremolo tailpiece. Well, I had success with the fourth low e string. I also went through two g strings before getting it right with the third. I won't go into the technicalities, but one clearly needs three hands to change the strings with the aforementioned Bigsby tailpiece from hell. I'm currently soaking my pants that I dripped blood on. I know there is a retro/vintage rockabilly vibe to the Bigsby, but Leo Fender had a much better idea for string bending. Ingenious, I would say. I installed the strings, gently giving eighth and quarter turns on the keys, all the while holding the ball end of the string onto the tiny post. I repeated the process in fits, spurts and snapped strings until all six were on. I tuned it up, gently, the way a bomb expert would disengage the right wires, sweating but dead still. It worked. Once it was in relative tune, I plugged her in, tossed off a couple quick riffs and, not wanting to tempt fate any further, unplugged the Supro and hung it back on the wall. I took out my '62 reissue sunburst Strat, and let 'er rip. Exhale and rock. In my former life, as an Angelino, I would bring my 12 string to David Neely to power change the strings. Pity I am so far from him now. For more reasons than one. He had not revealed his political leanings during our conversations in his shop over the Mesa Boogie store. We would talk gangs and the deterioration of the City of Angels, but it was between elections and Dubya was firmly ensconced dans la Maison Blanc. But I digress. I have committed to never owning another guitar with a Bigsby tremolo. I have also gained an added appreciation for Mr. Neely's unique skills.

Like Neil says, "Keep on Rockin' in the Free World!"